Two Reports in One. _Psyke and Smith week ending 26th July 2002

It's not very likely that _Psyclone is going to write a report for the website, so it's left to me again. I'm not sure why he won't write reports as his erudition and eloquence are proven and his command of the language was amply demonstrated this week when he prefaced every sentence with "In the Alps..." or "When I was on the Aigulle de..." or "It was only French 6c but...". However, reticence has gripped him tighter than the thought of a TD at 3000m, which means I get to give him a verbal going-over and he gets to cry and whinge again about the unfairness of his online reputation.

We went out twice this week. First was Tuesday 23rd July when we made a routine trip to Dunmore Head and climbed Beanbob VS 4c, Grecian Gift VS 4c, Absent Friends Five HS 4b and Orange Blossom HS, with _Psyke taking the two VS leads. Gone are the days when he shook and trembled his way up to a point where he could dramatically fall to within inches of the ground; this is a new _Psyke who leads competently, confidently and charismatically (and then makes a ten minute extempore peroration on the relative merits of Donegal dolerite and Alpine Dolomite).

On Thursday 25th July it was just the two of us again, which was fortunate for me because _Psyke might have buttonholed some other poor geezer in order to expound at length on the French grading system or the suddenness of Alpine weather changes. As luck would have it, though, I was to be treated to his attentions alone - I don't think I could have coped with having to share the experience.

We decided to try some off-the-beaten-track routes by abseiling ('rapping' to _Psyke) off the Galleon and attempting Golden Salamander. As we scrambled up the grassy ascent, _Psyke compared it to Alpine Summer meadows and extolled the virtues of cable cars for avoiding such time-consuming distractions. As we abseiled 40m to the platform below, _Psyke happened to mention that "fast rapping is essential in the Alps" because the unknown is just around the next couloir or deirdre. As we traversed round to our route above the sea, _Psyke speculated on his chances of swimming to safety with his 7.2kg rack hampering him. When I asked how he knew the exact mass of his rack he said (nonchalantly) "I had to weigh it for my trip to the Alps".

That's the way it went. I forget what routes we did.