RETURN OF THE EAGLES HVS 5a, 4b. 50M
Report on First Ascent.

Bald Eagle, Blind Eagle, and Eaglet returned to the Poisoned Glen at the weekend. A 2-pitch route had been cleaned a couple of years ago on West Buttress, which required climbing before the 2003 midge and drizzle season got under way. Blind Eagle abbed down first. Having a keen eye for a good pitch (and an even keener eye for a nasty unprotected one) he decided to lead the top pitch.

Having cast a beady eye over the lower pitch on the way down, Eaglet was also unenthusiastic, therefore popular opinion had it that Bald Eagle had to be the man for the job (despite some cock and bull story that he had just fallen off a ladder breaking both ankles). Rather unwisely, Baldy sealed his fate by showing off on the crux moves on the way down the abseil rope.

A last attempt to weasel out of his destiny by producing a pair of old rock boots, with barely one sole between them, failed miserably, so off went poor old Bald Eagle bridging up bravely on shattered ankles and sock soles, first one corner, then the higher steeper one, before thrashing about on the exit moves.

Blindy watched with concern (lest he might be called on to take over) whilst Eaglet sniggered unsympathetically. With many grunts and a mighty effort, Baldy's arse finally disappeared, up the delicate slab above, to a good belay ledge.

Eaglet followed him with obnoxious ease. Blindy was doing fairly well too, until the exit moves (the next bit is censored) and then they were all happily on the belay.

Some dispute then took place over the no. 4 friend. Baldy and Eaglet were belayed to it, but Blindy also needed it for the off-width! Force of numbers prevailed, and Blindy sulked off “sans no 4”. Hidden holds were found and even the overhanging flake had jugs, the one obstacle, an extremely high foothold (about knee height) was overcome, and soon he was perched on top of Eagle Rock. Across the small gap, a writhing crack wriggled its way 20 metres up the headwall swallowing no 2, 2.5 and 3 friends with relish, and Blind Eagle soared up it with all the poise and confidence of his role model, Eddie (the Eagle of course).

Martin McGuigan, Alan Tees (Alt. Leads) Mark McGuigan 6/04/03